Saturday, July 13, 2013 // 7:24 PM
Okay, so the previous post was actually saved a couple months back.
There are too many things for me to conclude. Oh right, I've graduated from TP and now,
I'm working as a contract staff in MOM. Can't believe the fact that I'm in the working society now.
Gotta adapt to a new lifestyle, hell yeah I still can't foresee my future YET. Somehow I just doubt my abilities of studying in a university. I don't know..it's just that the context of the modules seems like an out-of-the-world kind of thing. Started to question myself whether I can make it, or will I waste the time and money?
So that was how I'd landed myself with a job first. Still wondering whether I should convert into a full time staff, but I still have 4 months to consider till my contract ends.
To be frank, I was rather nervous on my first day of work. It's much quieter in an office environment and people can see me picking up things from my manager. Being an innate person, I find it difficult to clear my doubts with my manager. However, I'm really blessed to have a good subordinate. 'Cause after teaching me and showing a few examples, Joanne(manager) asked me to try it out with her guidance. Haa!
Goodness! Just 2 more weeks and it's our first anniversary. He's really an intimidate guy. Which I am absolutely shy in public. HAHA! What have I said. He plays many roles, like a mum, dad and a boyfriend.
Ohhh...I'm such a baby to him. Really thankful that he can bear with my sensitivity, emotional needs, and a capricious personality. It will be better if I can feed him fatter, what's up with his metabolism? Seriously. I'm totally envious of it. Or rather, jealous. -_-
Well, I just wish that things can always be this way. His understanding, love, and care. Change is a bitch.
Love my Dear. Oh yes, I realized he is someone who love compliments. Or should I say I don't compliment much? I'm just shyyyy.. Urgh! Yes, I love him being protective towards me. Although sometimes it sparked off some jealousy within him, but I just finds that adorable. He always liked me to compliment that he's strong, though he's small sized, but he have muscles. Well, I know he'll protect me if anything happens? Okay, I'll just assume it that way. He is always initiative to make me talk it out about my feelings, moodiness, and worries. Making funny faces to make me smile. Sometimes, I think that I'm being a wet blanket for not laughing at his jokes. 'cause I really don't think that it is funny? At least I know that he is making an effort. :)
Our world changes if we look at the bright sides of life. Though it ain't easy, but you will realize happiness is out for reach.
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// 6:36 PM
A new life I'm having ever since my first love stood a place in my heart.
I have to admit that LOVE takes courage. Every actions and words matter and it can really affect one,'cause
that special one is someone you cared for dearly.
The first few months were really a honeymoon for us, 'cause it's like someone new in our lives and it interest us to explore and see things in their way.
He is simple minded, and an easy going person. Of course, I love those values of him but, somehow it gives me a feeling that he doesn't have a mind of his own. Maybe he has, just that he wants to respect me or something? Everyone will get turned off when you're out for a date, and we ended up asking questions,"where to go? what to eat? go where?" It sometimes took 30 minutes for us to come up with a decision.
I love him, and that is why I love to do things that he likes. Like going to the arcade. Friends around me knows that I'm not an arcade-kind-of person. For him, I played the games to share the joyous moment with him. Soon, I kinda like playing some of the games.
Haa, and he's really one lazy person I've met so far. It is totally a battle to get him out of bed during a nap. Yea, and the problem with me now, is his laziness. We are both working as temp staff now. Thus, the only time to spend together is on the weekends. Working on the weekdays really took a toll on us and the weekends is ideal for a well deserved rest.
I look forward to every weekends 'cause I know that there is a chance for me to meet him. On some days, he preferred "nua-ing" at home, and I can understand that. We can still text though. However, I can't stop myself from feeling neglected and felt unimportant. It's not about us not meeting, but it is the replies and texts I got from him that affects me. I can predict his texts and after a reply or so, he would ask "what am I doing? Then MIA for like an hour or two? Soon, there was nothing left for me to say 'cause everything becomes predictable. I didn't talk to him about this 'cause I think I'm just being sensitive.
I remembered one of my friend asked me how I'd celebrated Valentines with him. We just had dinner, and honestly speaking, I can't remember what we did on that day. I'm contented that we can meet up on Valentines, but I don't wanna hear any apologies from him saying that he didn't get me a present. His presence is really enough, I don't need an apology.
I really love him, really do.
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